Posts by David Benjamin
The tortured trees and scary waiters of blvd. St. Germain
The tortured trees and scary waiters of blvd. St. Germain by David Benjamin PARIS — The Ville de Paris is destroying the evidence. For decades on the boulevard St. Germain, its plucky trees would welcome the spring by putting out new shoots, slender green tendrils reaching hopefully toward the fickle sun. And then, in the…
Read More"Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood"
“Oh Lord, please don’t let me be misunderstood” by David Benjamin “As members of the winning team, Trump supporters have no urgent need to understand the other side.” — Amanda Hess, The New York Times PARIS — Pundits — especially the sensitive, liberal ones — keep telling me how important it is to understand the…
Read MoreJack Palance takes charge
Jack Palance takes charge by David Benjamin “Net neutrality requires internet services providers to charge equal rates and offer equal speeds for all data usage. Without the policy, a telecommunications company — like Pai’s former employer Verizon — would be allowed to impose blocks on websites at its discretion or allow providers to create so-called…
Read MoreThe Thing on the Bedside Table
The Thing on the Bedside Table by David Benjamin “Life! Life, do you hear me?! Give my creation LIFE!!” — Dr. Frederick Frankenstein, Young Frankenstein (1974) WASHINGTON D.C. — The beautiful woman with the strangely Oriental eyes, cantilevered cheekbones and subtly protruding lips awoke, as usual, at 4 a.m. and drowsily regarded the thing on…
Read MoreKnock yourself out, Mom
Knock yourself out, Mom by David Benjamin “Each team will have six to nine players on the field, instead of 11; the field will be far smaller; kickoffs and punts will be eliminated; and players will start each play in a crouching position instead of in a three-point stance.” — New York Times, 31 Jan.…
Read MoreImaginary icebergs
Imaginary icebergs by David Benjamin “A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.” — Joseph Stalin MADISON, Wis. — There’s little evidence — even in the alt-right online sixth dimension — that ravening hordes of “illegal aliens” are swarming across the Rio Grande and killing Americans. The firmest numbers I could…
Read More… or the Highway
… or the Highway by David Benjamin “He didn’t like it. That song stuck and he couldn’t get it off his shoe. He always thought that song was self-serving and self-indulgent.” — Tina Sinatra, on her father’s opinion of “My Way” MADISON, Wis. — I was impressed, perhaps awestruck, by Rachel Maddow’s restraint on Inauguration…
Read MoreWhat Obama and Trump really said
What Obama and Trump Really Said by David Benjamin (As a service to mankind, Harvey Brusbussen, editor-in-chief of the international hacking organization, IncontinentWiki, has released, exclusively to this reporter, the full transcript of the post-election meeting in the Oval Office between President Barack Obama and President-Elect Donald Trump. Here it is.) Trump: “So, how’d I…
Read MoreThe geeks who live on the hill
The geeks who live on the hill by David Benjamin “Let’s make sure none of our kids have to drive.” — Jen Hsun Huang, CEO, Nvidia LAS VEGAS — In the real world, nobody talks about self-driven cars. We have other stuff on our minds. If we talk about cars at all, it’s usually something…
Read MoreA philosophic interlude at Le Fumoir
A philosophic interlude at Le Fumoir by David Benjamin “Homer tells us also that Sisyphus had put Death in chains.” — Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus PARIS — Something about this joint gets me to over-thinking. Maybe it’s the art on the walls. My favorite is a painting of two gauzy and anorexic art-deco…
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