Posts by David Benjamin
Saving Alaska from literature
by David Benjamin “So now do you see why books are hated and feared? They show the pores in the face of life. The comfortable people want only wax moon faces, poreless, hairless, expressionless.” — Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 MADISON, Wis. — The latest illiterate school board to get into the book-banning biz is in…
Read MorePandemic notes 1.0: First pants, then shoes
by David Benjamin “With malice toward none; with charity for all; with firmness in the right, as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in; to bind up the nation’s wounds; to care for him who shall have borne the battle, and for his widow,…
Read MoreThis can’t be happening to us
by David Benjamin “After the Black Death came the Renaissance. From the depths of economic horror came Roosevelt’s New Deal. From this horror, so far, come the senseless twists and turns of the orange Narcissus.” — Roger Cohen, N.Y. Times MADISON, Wis. — Although I can’t explain why, I’ve always enjoyed reading books about fatal…
Read MoreHere’s mud in your eye
by David Benjamin “I can’t believe I have to say this. But please don’t drink bleach.” — Joe Biden MADISON, Wis. — I can’t believe I’m saying this but Joe Biden, bless his heart, must be wrong. After all, the White House’s crack medical team — led by Jared “Doc” Kushner and his faithful sidekick…
Read MoreThe soiling of the American flag… again
by David Benjamin “… The flag should never be used as wearing apparel, bedding, or drapery. It should never be festooned, drawn back, nor up, in folds, but always allowed to fall free… The flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any manner whatsoever… No part of the flag should ever be used…
Read MoreThere is no God but God… except for you-know-who
by David Benjamin “To say no to President Trump would be saying no to God, and I won’t do that.” — Rev. Paula White MADISON, Wis. — Ever since Donald Trump landed ego-first on the Resolute desk like a 250-pound sack of Yukon Gold potatoes, I’ve been mystified — not by his supporters, fans, cronies…
Read MoreAbsence makes the heart grow fonder, dude
by David Benjamin “By April, you know, in theory, when it gets a little warmer, it miraculously goes away.” — Trump MADISON, Wis. — Yo, Big Don. I hope you don’t mind me calling you that, But hey, it fits. I mean, big? You’re larger than life, yo. And you are the Don! So, anyhow,…
Read More“Why don’t we pass the time…”
by David Benjamin “Only the Pontiacs, Nashes and cellar-dwelling La Salles are in financial condition to buy any minor league players to improve their clubs at this time.” — Jack Kerouac MADISON, Wis. — I learned baseball solitaire from Dick Albright, my first best friend in high school. He invented a game played with a…
Read More“Won’t ya let me take you on a sea cruise?”
by David Benjamin “No one reached out to me and said, ‘As a senior citizen, are you willing to take a chance on your survival in exchange for keeping the America that all America loves for your children and grandchildren?’ If that’s the exchange, I’m all in.” — Texas Lieutenant Gov. Daniel Patrick WASHINGTON, D.C.…
Read MorePrincess Leia for a Day
by David Benjamin “We should also put an end to the airlines’ pursuit of smaller and smaller seats, which are not only uncomfortable and even physically harmful, but also foster in-flight rage and make the job of flight attendants nigh unbearable.” — Tim Wu. New York Times, 16 March 2020 Ed Bastian CEO Delta Airlines…
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