Posts by David Benjamin
There is no God but God… except for you-know-who
by David Benjamin “To say no to President Trump would be saying no to God, and I won’t do that.” — Rev. Paula White MADISON, Wis. — Ever since Donald Trump landed ego-first on the Resolute desk like a 250-pound sack of Yukon Gold potatoes, I’ve been mystified — not by his supporters, fans, cronies…
Read MoreAbsence makes the heart grow fonder, dude
by David Benjamin “By April, you know, in theory, when it gets a little warmer, it miraculously goes away.” — Trump MADISON, Wis. — Yo, Big Don. I hope you don’t mind me calling you that, But hey, it fits. I mean, big? You’re larger than life, yo. And you are the Don! So, anyhow,…
Read More“Why don’t we pass the time…”
by David Benjamin “Only the Pontiacs, Nashes and cellar-dwelling La Salles are in financial condition to buy any minor league players to improve their clubs at this time.” — Jack Kerouac MADISON, Wis. — I learned baseball solitaire from Dick Albright, my first best friend in high school. He invented a game played with a…
Read More“Won’t ya let me take you on a sea cruise?”
by David Benjamin “No one reached out to me and said, ‘As a senior citizen, are you willing to take a chance on your survival in exchange for keeping the America that all America loves for your children and grandchildren?’ If that’s the exchange, I’m all in.” — Texas Lieutenant Gov. Daniel Patrick WASHINGTON, D.C.…
Read MorePrincess Leia for a Day
by David Benjamin “We should also put an end to the airlines’ pursuit of smaller and smaller seats, which are not only uncomfortable and even physically harmful, but also foster in-flight rage and make the job of flight attendants nigh unbearable.” — Tim Wu. New York Times, 16 March 2020 Ed Bastian CEO Delta Airlines…
Read MoreCovid 19, Trump 0
by David Benjamin “Now the Democrats are politicizing the coronavirus. Coronavirus. They’re politicizing it. And this is their new hoax.” — Donald Trump WASHINGTON, 4 November 2020 — In the wake of President Donald Trump’s crushing defeat yesterday, pundits and analysts are speculating cautiously that Trump’s “base” of rabidly loyal followers might been been decisively…
Read MoreThe purple prose of Farrow
by David Benjamin ““I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.” — Woody Allen PARIS — Ronan Farrow has spent his life striving to spit out the silver spoon he was born with. When he does one of his cool and princely TV interviews, you can —…
Read MoreThe foreign despondent
by David Benjamin “First there was a single truck driver. in Genoa, then another, a friend of his, who went up to Milan… We have a printer in Genoa, he hands bundled papers off to three or four friends, and they spread it out among their friends. One takes ten, another takes twenty. And from…
Read MoreThe Wayback Machine and the Manchurian Zombie
by David Benjamin “Wait a minute, Doc. Are you telling me that you built a time machine… out of a DeLorean?” — Michael J. Fox (Marty McFly), Back to the Future MADISON, Wis. — Ever since I watched Rod Taylor and Yvette Mimieux fighting off the Morlocks sometime during the 80th century in George Pal’s…
Read MoreSiberia for naughty boys
by David Benjamin “I had a doctor that gave me a letter — a very strong letter on the heels.” — Donald John Trump MADISON, Wis. — If, around 1960, I’d been a kid in the Soviet Union, it would have been my own private Siberia. If I’d been a kid in France, Devil’s…
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