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The Weekly Screed
“Live long and prosper” by David Benjamin “To the moon, Alice!” — Ralph Kramden My wife, Hotlips, crack technology journalist, is in year-end listmaking mode. Everybody in the news biz does this. Among my favorite examples of this genre is the New York Times’ annual cavalcade of obituaries. The Times 2015 death march includes Leonard…
Read More...To drive or not to drive by David Benjamin “… Went around a corner and I passed a truck I whispered a prayer just for luck Fenders was clicking the guardrail posts The guys beside me were white as a ghost…” — Charlie Ryan, “Hot Rod Lincoln” MADISON, Wis. — My mother was a debutante…
Read More...How Joseph Saved the Nativity Scene by David Benjamin BETHLEHEM, 0 A.D. — This usually sleepy village was bustling and noisy with pilgrims who’d been ordered there by Caesar to register for the Roman census. Among them was an aged carpenter named Joseph, who had just arrived after the long trek from a grubby little…
Read More...Daddy-O meets Quentin Tarantino by David Benjamin MADISON, Wis. — Guns are the thing. As the latest massacre reports trickle in, we’re beginning to grasp the disturbing banality of Syed Farook and Tashfeen Malik. Yes, Tashfeen grew up in a hotbed of Muslim fundamentalism in Pakistan and pledged her troth, before pulling the trigger, to…
Read More...The Muslim plank by David Benjamin “I said the wall, and I was referring to the wall, but database is okay, and watch list is okay, and surveillance is okay… I want surveillance of these people that are coming in — the Trojan Horse — I want to know who the hell they are ……
Read More...An act of God by David Benjamin “Killing random people in restaurants and at concerts is a strategy that reflects its perpetrators’ fundamental weakness. It isn’t going to establish a caliphate in Paris. What it can do, however, is inspire fear — which is why we call it terrorism, and shouldn’t dignify it with the…
Read More...When cool was still cool by David Benjamin “Bond is important: this invincible superman that every man would like to copy, that every woman would like to conquer, this dream we all have of survival. And then one can’t help liking him…” — Sean Connery MADISON, Wis. — With every release of a new James…
Read More...Do-gooders from Hell by David Benjamin MADISON, Wis. — In my childhood hometown of Tomah, Wisconsin, two quietly grand old buildings have survived the march of development. One is the library, underwritten by Andrew Carnegie and designed by one of Frank Lloyd Wright’s more tasteful disciples. The other is the VA Hospital, built of stolid…
Read More...Oh, Susanna, now don’t you lie to me by David Benjamin MADISON, Wis. — Thanks to my wife, the hotshot high-tech journalist, I get to crash parties where I don’t belong. For me, “the turd in the punchbowl” isn’t just a grace note. It’s my red badge of impertinence. So, there I was — without…
Read More...Lying about history, to our children by David Benjamin “… Soviet pressure against the free institutions of the Western world is something that can be contained by the adroit and vigilant application of counterforce at a series of constantly shifting geographical and political points, corresponding to the shifts and manoeuvers of Soviet policy, but which…
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